Growing in the Gospel: A Devotion from Titus 2
At the recent women's ministry "Growing in the Gospel" event, Melissa, one of our members who also recently completed her traineeship, gave a devotion from Titus 2. She walked the women through God's Word and encouraged all present to read and obey His Word.
For as long as I can remember, I equated discipleship with a programme, a fixed way of helping people to grow in spiritual maturity. I thought that to disciple someone meant that I had to carve out time to read the Bible or a book with them, one on one. But with all the demands of life, I felt I just didn’t have the bandwidth to do discipleship.
And I felt very guilty about it. Even as recent as church camp, when we talked at length about doing spiritual good to one another, there was this nagging at the back of my mind telling me that I should be discipling someone or being discipled by someone.
Hence, I find it ironic, but also amusing, that God in His wisdom should ask Bibianna to approach me to do this sharing about discipleship. I am the least qualified to speak about this—and still don’t have it all together. But by God’s grace, we have His Word in Titus 2 that helps us to know what discipling looks like.
TEACH WHAT ACCORDS WITH SOUND DOCTRINE
Paul prefaces this passage with a command to both men and women to teach what accords with sound doctrine (Titus 2:1). This is a key message of this letter which he again repeats in Titus 2:3. In fact, in Titus 1, he says in his greetings to Titus that the purpose of his labours is for the sake of the faith of God’s elect and their knowledge of the truth (Titus 1:1). And Titus 1:9, Paul tells Titus that an elder must hold firm to the trustworthy word as taught, so that they may be able to give instruction in sound doctrine and to rebuke those who contradict it (Titus 1:9).
BELIEF AND BEHAVIOUR
In Titus 2:3-5, Paul links the teaching of sound doctrine with a life that is evidenced by the fruit of the gospel. Our behaviour is shaped by our beliefs. If we believe the gospel, then our lives should be characterised by godliness. Jesus says in Luke 6:43-44, “For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, for each tree is known by its own fruit."
Faith by itself, if it does not have works, is dead (James 2:17). And as many Reformed scholars have put it—we are justified by our faith alone, but not by faith that is alone. It is impossible to have faith that is not evidenced by our works.
GOOD WORKS
What does this good fruit or works look like? It is there in Titus 2:3-5—being reverent in behaviour, not slanderers or slaves to much wine, being loving towards our husbands and children, being self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind and submissive to our own husbands.
Just to be clear—these instructions do not apply to married women and mothers only, but to all women who are speaking the truth to one another. Paul himself calls Titus his “true child in a common faith” (Titus 1:4) and Timothy his “beloved child” (2 Tim 1:2).
The good works described here are relational; they happen in community—in our families, at our places of work, in church.
TRAINING
So how do we get from teaching what is good to living a life that reflects the gospel? Through practice (or training)! James says that we are to be doers of the word, and not hearers only (James 1:22).
Training is a lot like parenting. As a parent, you are not just helping your child grow in knowledge, you are also training them to behave in a certain way through affirmation and discipline. Deuteronomy 6:7 says we should teach God’s Word diligently to our children and shall talk of them when we sit in our house, and when we walk by the way, and when we lie down, and when we rise.
There are many forms of teaching. Of course, there is talking about the Bible with our children, doing family devotions with them, being intentional about the gospel in our conversations with them. But to talk to them from morning to night is a tall ask. Instead, this verse in Deuteronomy implies that our children also learn through our conduct when we go about our daily activities.
They model our behaviour, how we treat others like waiters at a restaurant, other family members, and friends. Are we kind in our speech, are we hospitable? They listen in to our conversations, how we speak about others, what our conversations revolve around—work? money? gossip? They see what we do around the house, do we leave everything to our helper or do we chip in with the household chores. What routines do we have? Do we spend all our free time watching Netflix? Do we sacrifice our comforts or adjust our schedule to make time for others?
We will make mistakes. We may discipline or say unkind words out of anger after a long day or take out our work stress on our children. But it is in these moments that we can clothe ourselves with Christ’s humility and ask our children for forgiveness when we have sinned against them.
The goal of training described in Titus 2 is to present everyone mature in Christ (c.f. Col 1:28). We want to see people grow in their knowledge of God and understanding of the Bible, so that they may proclaim Him to everyone. We want to see them grow in godly character so that they may resemble more of Christ.
If we live according to the truth, the word of God will not be reviled (Titus 2:5). In what contexts can Titus 2:3-5 be applied? Let us unpack it.
APPLICATION 1: WORKING AT HOME
The verses here in Titus 2 teaches us that working at home is spiritual work, approved by God. But that doesn’t mean that the work is easy! New mothers often get disillusioned when they realise that the bulk of their work involves simple and mundane tasks, revolving around the baby. Anyone who is in a caregiving role, whether it be taking care of children or aging parents, would agree that looking after others requires a tremendous amount of self-sacrifice that usually goes unappreciated. We’re not always treated nicely either! We get tired and need reminders from others who have gone before us to be faithful in the things that God has given to us, without being bitter or resentful.
In our culture where domestic life is usually looked down on, we may be tempted to feel sorry for ourselves. When I became a stay-at-home mom, I used to get questions like—"Oh, you’ve got a good degree or a good thing going for you at work, and have so much potential, why are you staying at home?" Being able to "multi-task" and "have it all’ seems to be the new standard for women, able to fly high in their careers while raising trophy children. And so for us who are working at home, we may feel the need to prove our worth by producing an “exemplary household” so that others can pat us on our backs.
But here in Titus 2, we see that teaching our children sound doctrine or modelling daily gospel living to other younger women is rewarding. We do it so that we may adorn the doctrine of God. Living according to the gospel is attractive! In John 6:35, Jesus says, “I am the Bread of Life; whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst. We can rest and be fully satisfied in Christ! We need spiritual mothers and sisters to remind us of these truths.
APPLICATION 2: SECULAR WORK
Some of you might be thinking—Do we all need to be “working at home”? Does the Bible say that women cannot have jobs outside the home? Are we not allowed to be ambitious at work? We can look to Scripture for wisdom. Let’s look at Proverbs 31.
She considers a field and buys it; with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard (Prov 31:16).
She perceives that her merchandise is profitable. Her lamp does not go out at night (Prov 31:18).
She makes linen garments and sells them; she delivers sashes to the merchant (Prov 31:24).
The woman in Proverbs 31 is a productive woman. She is not confined to the home but undertakes commercial activity too. She demonstrates wise judgement, a high degree of entrepreneurial skill and responsibility in making financial decisions. She is able to realise an economic gain from her labour and is able to deploy a substantial amount of money to purchase land. She works hard—day and night.
Similarly, in Titus 2:9-10, Paul instructs bondservants (or employees) to be well-pleasing, not argumentative, not pilfering, but showing all good faith. In short, they are to be a blessing to their masters (employers).
While secular work is valuable, worthwhile and important, it is easy for one to get sucked in by the financial rewards or the affirmation from our bosses. We may spend a disproportionate amount of time and energy on our secular work, at the expense of looking after the household.
Wives and mothers, Titus 2:5 is reminding us that we should not detract from our primary responsibility for the day-to-day care of our homes and children. Proverbs 31 also talks about how a woman who fears the Lord is also a blessing to her husband and children. And I highly recommend that you read that passage in its entirety for yourself after this.
For those of us who are single or have no children, we are not insulated from these trappings of this world. Without the accountability of a spouse or dependents, we can work wantonly in our jobs and spend lavishly on our lifestyles. This seems to be what our society tells us is what we are entitled to do. May I encourage you, if you’re tempted in this way, pour your time and treasure into kingdom work—Matthew 6:20-21 says,"...lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."
As Christians, we do not work to gain self-fulfilment or fame or personal kudos—whether it be in secular work or working at home. Both are good. But like any good thing, it can become an idol when we start to look to our work for our significance and value. We are not automatically set to gospel mode; we desperately need to remind each other daily—or as many times as needed!—that only Christ’s work redeems humanity.
APPLICATION 3: SUBMITTING TO OUR OWN HUSBANDS
Titus 2:4 teaches us that through the teaching of the Word, we are trained to love our husbands, and it follows that we show we love them by submitting to them (Titus 2:5).
Our culture values independence over submission. Being submissive to our husbands seems like such an archaic idea in this day and age, that women are somehow inferior to men.
Firstly, I want to establish that we are not inferior to men—God has made both male and female in His image (Gen 1:26-28) and we heirs together with Christ (Gal 3:28-29).
Secondly, submission in marriage is modelled on Christ’s headship over the church. In Ephesians 5:22 it says, wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church. But this is not the kind of leadership as we understand it from the world. Ephesians 5:25 says, "husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her". Husbands are commanded to love their wives self-sacrificially as we submit to them in marriage.
Submission to our own husbands is therefore deference to their leadership, and wives are commanded to support our husbands in this role.
APPLYING TITUS 2
I recognise that there are different women here with different struggles, and I won’t be able to cover all the various applications of this passage. Titus 2 is applied slightly differently for each one of us.
If you’re struggling with any particular issue, it could be an understanding of something in the Bible or a personal struggle, may I encourage you to reach out to us so that we can pray with you and link you up with someone who can walk with you and point you to Christ. You can write to us, or fill in this form.
Similarly, if you are an older woman—let me say that younger women need you. We need you to remind us of the truth. We need your wisdom in godly living. You don’t have to have your life under control or in order, you don’t have to be in a ministry traineeship programme to be part of this community of women who support and help one other to grow in Christ.
So far, I’ve spent quite a bit of time describing how Titus 2 exhorts us to teach sound doctrine so that we can train others up in godliness, to equip us to resist the lies of the world.
There are many benefits that can be reaped from older women sharing their lives with younger women—helping each other with practical needs, providing emotional support, a listening ear, accountability, the list goes on. But the fundamental question is—what is the fuel that empowers us to do life together in this way? Are we merely teaching and modelling for each other how to live virtuous and morally good lives? What sustains this way of life?
Personal belief in the gospel
The answer to these questions is found in Titus 2:11-14. The fuel that empowers us and sustains us to live this way is the grace of God that has appeared bringing salvation for all people.
We believe that there is a God, and that we have been made in His image to love and serve Him. But through our own wilful, sinful rebellion against Him, we have completely and utterly failed at it. We did what we wanted instead of what God wants and became His enemies. And because God is unerringly good and holy, He will execute perfect justice against all sin.
But God being rich in mercy, because of the great love He has for us, sent His only son Jesus to live a perfect, sinless life in this world. And in obedience to his father, Jesus died on the cross, bore the wrath that we deserved, to redeem us from all lawlessness.
Then God raised Jesus from the dead, and when Jesus ascended into heaven, He presented His perfect sacrifice to His heavenly father and it was accepted. He now sits at the right hand of God and calls all of us to turn from our sins and trust in Him. We were dead in our trespasses, but we are now forgiven for our sins and made alive together with Christ. All by the grace of God.
As Christians, Christ has freed us from the shackles of sin to allow us to choose Him—to deny ourselves, take up our cross and follow Him (Mk 8:34). This is why we are able to love one another sacrificially. It says in 1 John 3:16, "By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers." Do you believe who Jesus is and what He did on the cross for you? If so, would you follow His example and love not in word or talk but in deed and truth? Jesus says in John 13:34-35, “a new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”
Salvation has a corporate aspect—a Biblical community
The grace of God shown in the gospel trains us to die to ourselves (renounce ungodliness) and to wait with hope for the second coming of Christ. But our salvation also has a corporate aspect. In Titus 2:14, it says that we have been redeemed and purified so that we can be a people for his own possession who are zealous for good works.
Look around the room—we all come from different walks of life, are of different ages and in different seasons and phases of life. We may not have similar life experiences or similar needs or interests or even natural affinities, but Scripture says that we are a people for his own possession—one holy people. We are no longer strangers and aliens, but we are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God (Eph 2:19).
A sinner who repents and trusts in Christ isn’t only born again. He is born into a new family. The horizontal follows the vertical. And what do we do in the family of God?
Drawing from real observations of interactions that I have observed in our church, we can:
Show hospitality because as God’s family, we should not be anonymous to one another. We can greet each other warmly because we share the same Spirit. I’ve seen members praying for each other in the middle of the Fellowship Hall after the service. Just two people in a noisy crowd. I know of parents of Sunday School children who invite their teachers out for lunch to get to know them better.
Open our homes and lives. I know many women who invite younger women or singles into their homes and let them observe or participate in family life such as being part of family meals and family devotions with the children. We don’t have to be perfect or have everything under control. It is also important for us to be open with our mistakes and struggles, and for others to see us working through them.
I’ve noticed how the young single men who hang out with families build good rapport with teenage boys. And how the boys look up to them, and how the young men yield a lot of influence in their lives. I hope that we can see more of this happening among our women and girls too. Young women—you can be a spiritual mother to others!
I know of a couple with three kids who invited a young unmarried couple from church on a road trip to JB. The extended time together helped them to move past the hi-bye interactions and Fellowship Hall-conversations to deeper and more meaningful relationships. This sister-in-Christ shared that it is important to show an interest in each other’s lives and be keenly attuned to the little details like birthdays, things they celebrate and take delight in, and make a mental note of them.
Care for our own parents or siblings. For those of us who are single and living with parents, let’s not just look forward to the day that we are able to move out when we get married or have enough money to buy a house. God has placed us in our families, and we can continue to love them. These are quiet faithful ways of obeying God.
Share our resources (time, talent, treasure) with others. If we have been able to afford a house, we can host a CG or a missionary back on home leave. We can help to babysit for a couple so that they can catch up with each other or get others to babysit for us so that we can have a less distracted time ministering to other women.
For those of us who seem to have limited capacity, we can pray that God will make our hearts available for others and be present when we talk to them. It is so easy for us to be distracted by the 101 things in our lives.
For those of us who are working at home, we can invite those who are freelancing or on shift work over on their off days.
Intentionally disciple one another in small groups, one on one, reading a book or the Bible together. Perhaps at future women's ministry events, you can agree to do a sharing like this to minister to others in a big group or a workshop. Or, consider being involved in any of the events going on at church e.g. leading or facilitating a Moms Connect session, attending Wednesday Bible Study.
Be intentional about the gospel in our informal conversations. For example, catch up with another mother to see how she’s doing once a month or quarter. Or follow up with a text message if someone has shared a prayer request or concern with you earlier in the week.
As a spiritual family, it should be normal to talk about spiritual things and do spiritual good to one another. The bulk of "ministry' in congregation is the thousands of small conversations and actions springing from God’s Word. We serve one another with our various gifts and abilities because we desperately need each other for mutual edification.
This is essentially what a local church is—an assembly of blood-bought, Spirit-filled worshippers who build one another up by God’s Word and affirm one another as citizens of Christ’s kingdom through the ordinances. God has chosen the church to make the gospel visible to the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places (Eph 3:10).
CONCLUSION
I started this devotional with a sharing of my personal struggles and with discipleship, but I’d like to conclude with an example of God’s grace in my life which I remembered while preparing for this sharing.
It struck me that since becoming a member of GBC in 2010, a lot of my ‘discipling’ moments surfaced rather naturally. They weren’t planned. I recalled a particular interaction with an older sister in Christ who has since moved to another church.
A lot of these discipling moments that I had with her actually happened in my car when we were carpooling to church or Care Group or coming back from a meal together with then, the other Career YAs. We’d sit in front of her house, in the car, with the engine off and windows down. We could talk for hours! But they weren’t just any kind of conversations.
They were conversations that were framed in a gospel grid. They helped us discover and root out the sin in our lives and grow in our understanding of the gospel. As an immature Christian with lots of preconceived notions about the faith because of my previous church experiences, our reading of the Bible in Care Group and other Christian books helped me grow in my convictions of Scripture.
But what left a bigger impact on me was the way that she modelled gospel living. She kept me accountable when I was dating, and cried with me when I was heart-broken. She prayed with me when I needed Godly wisdom to deal with a conflict in church. And gave me a lot of emotional support through prayer. She rejoiced with me when I got engaged and when I had my first child. She rejoiced with me when I had my second even though she struggles with infertility.
And when we met up for the first time after a number of years, post-COVID, it felt like the conversations could keep going. It was not awkward, and we were still able to share our similar experiences of miscarriage and caring for aging parents in a deep but also edifying way, reminding each other of the rest that we have in Christ and His sacrificial love that helps us to continue to keep loving in spite of the disappointments and hurts.
How did we get here? We fixed our eyes on Jesus (Heb 12:2), not on ourselves. Because of the grace of God, we are able to open our hearts to one another without fear, without any compulsion to self-protect or put on airs. We know that we are hidden in Christ, there is nothing to hide, and so we can be generous in our affections and hospitable to the joys and pains of others. As Paul says in 2 Corinthians 6:11-13, "We have spoken freely to you, Corinthians; our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also."
I hope that you have had a chance or an experience today to speak a word of encouragement to someone over the course of this event. It’s a start to building a beautiful, meaningful and edifying relationship with a fellow sister in Christ. Dear friends, you are so loved by God that he sent Jesus to die on the cross in our place so that you may be reconciled to Him and partake in His glory. This is the good news that has been passed down from one generation to the next as we wait for Jesus to come again. Who are you going to share it with today?