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Encouraging and Building

The Lord has commanded us to love one another with a view to building one another up in Christ. Opportunities abound to encourage and edify others, so long as our eyes are deliberately open and our hearts intentionally loving and giving. It has been my privilege to get to know a lady in church who was just embarking on a dating relationship. I was concerned that she first understand God's purposes for a Christian marriage before even starting to date seriously, so I approached someone else in church to recommend me a good book for her. To my great delight, she not only read the book ("Love That Lasts: When Marriage Meets Grace by Gary and Betsy Ricucci"), but also penned her reflections of her reading, which she has graciously consented to share here.

“Marriage is created by God, for His glory - first - and this goes against all secular notions that marriage is meant first for the enjoyment of the couple. This fills me with joy and excitement: should God allow marriage to be a portion of my life, then there is so much more grace to look forward to as I learn of Christ and imitate Him more and more through the journey, and as I also receive His love and grace ever more abundantly through my husband.

The argument laid out in the book has challenged my perspective of a wife's calling to submit, which previously I was reluctant to accept. I cannot run away from the command to submit to my husband, but I can understand the wisdom behind God's call for me to submit, and so deliberately learn to be a submissive wife. Biblical submission springs from an understanding that God has given the heavier responsibility of leadership to the husband, and thereby coming to be aware of, appreciate and support the efforts put in by him to fulfill his Biblical calling. Submission can be seen as God's call for me to learn and show self-sacrificial love.

It is my personal prayer that I learn not to take for granted my boyfriend’s efforts to love me and provide for me, and to give thanks for any godly virtue I see in him. With this growing awareness comes the desire to pray for him according to the Lord's desires for him - to flourish in his God-given roles and responsibilities so that he can be a good testimony to those around him.

The Lord has been gracious - and daring enough - to put us through some of our present experiences together. I am very sure that God will put our relationship to the test, and I pray that we will have teachable hearts, that He will use this period of time to train us in righteousness, holiness, and purity.

Marriage is ultimately to reflect Christ and the church. Husband and wife are uniquely positioned and privileged to help each other grow in holiness, in the image of Christ. As a church, members are likewise to passionately pursue this same goal in one another's lives. This, I believe, is what mutual encouragement and edification is all about.”